making up for lost time, numbness, keeping frightened animals alive

when the backstabber tells you,
"this was a victory"
don't forget the universal method.
disregarding advice and looking down.
disassembling your head,
putting eyes the wrong way round
so they can roll, roll, roll
on the ground that's ground
into the soles of your feet.
the grains and rot in your soul
that your whirligig eyes can see.

i forgot how the song goes.
i slept too long this morning
and when i finally woke up everything
was so much more dangerous than it used to be,
and i keep thinking people are trying to murder me,
but maybe i just forgot how the song goes
that one hymn that everything knows.
the last line is "this was a victory"
but i take apart my brain and i can't find the rest
this is not a test. this is not a test

here's the big fucking secret.
listen up, you lowlifes,
you dogs you rancid meat,
you meat-hooks, you addicts fresh off the street.
we're all scared.
out of mind, out of breath,
so paranoid we keep our eyes going twenty-four seven.
we're scared of hardships and scared of death.
arthritic dogs kept alive from a lack of pity,
a fear that there is no heaven and some dumb loyalty.
their brains are so small they can't remember
the way that everything used to be.
yet the first line of the song is "nothing ever changes
everything will always stay the same"
but we keep forgetting with our small small brains
remember my son, this was a victory