im/personal attacks

i'm glad you're here anyway man. it's nice
having friendly faces around.
i thought you said they were treating you better.
they are. most of them. but some of them
it's not their fault.
well can't you tell them about it?
it's not that easy man. i can't just
do it. i get really scared. i ask
for answers but when i come back
all that's there is a blank page. then i
always erase my question. i'm afraid
other people will see it.
i thought you said you were happier.
i am. i definitely am. it's just
the ups make the downs so much worse, man.
like the trips home, running errands,
and acting, acting, again, over the phone,
at the receptionist's desk,
using my hat with the long earflaps as a tool,
jutting my shoulderblades out like a
failed attempt at flight.
i don't need classes.
i'm a pro.
at what? acting? failing? flying?
that's a dumb question.