holding someone's back hair

i hate sharing. i'm a little kid
with a tenuous grasp on the english language.
i eat bubble gum for breakfast and
play 52 pickup with the vacuum cleaner.
i can spell azerbaijan. you guys
always catch me in a good mood.
being bogged down isn't so bad when
your friends are there to make
fireworks out of the cattails.
i tell little kids to get off the lawn
when they crawl into my birdhouse.
nothing's clean and everything is
in its proper place. so stop
yelling at me, you're not my mom.
where did you put the shotgun?
these poetry tomes are staring me down so
let's attack them in
a non-linear fashion.