spring skiing could kill you

exhaustion is not a buildup.
it is not a process or a result.
it is a single point
when you dig your edges into the ice
and suddenly you feel this pain.

this is when you get hurt.

every glance down the mountain
this is when you get hurt
throws doubt in your eyes like
this is when you get hurt
powder snow (oh, if only)
this is when you get hurt
because what if the grade is just a little too steep
this is when you get hurt
or the snow too soft?
this is when you get hurt
it is difficult to describe but:

from the moment exhaustion strikes
i know that any second my legs could give out entirely
and send me sprawling over the edge


i skied like that for two hours on wednesday morning


(the architect of this mountain could not possibly have known
that one day i would rip it to shreds
but not before it ripped me to shreds first)